You are a Florida Hurricane Veteran if:

You exhibit a slight twitch when introduced to anyone with the first
names of Bonnie, Charley, Frances, Ivan, or Jeanne.

Your freezer never has more than $20 worth of food in it any given time

You're looking at paint swatches for the plywood on your windows, to accent the house color

You think of your hall closet/saferoom as "cozy"

Your pool is more accurately described as "framed in" than "screened in"

Your freezer in the garage now only has homemade ice in it

You no longer worry about relatives visiting during the summer months

You, too, haven't heard back from the insurance adjuster

You now understand what that little "2% hurricane deductible" phrase really means

You're putting a collage together on your driveway of roof shingles from your neighborhood

You have a 5 gallon bucket of roofing tar in the garage

You were once proud of your 16" electric chain saw

Your Street has more than 3 "NO WAKE" signs posted

You now own 5 large ice chests

You can cook "anything" on a propane grill

You own more than two portable propane tanks

Your parrot can now say" hammered, pounded and hunker down"

You recognize people in line at the free ice, gas and plywood locations

You stop what you're doing and clap and wave when you see a convoy of power company trucks come down your street  - You're depressed when they don't stop

You have the personal cell phone numbers of the managers for: plywood, roofing supplies and generators at Home Depot on your speed dialer

You've spent more than $20 on "Tall white kitchen bags" to make your own sand bags

You're considering upgrading your 16" to a 20" chainsaw

You know what "Bar chain oil" is

You're thinking of getting your wife the hardhat with the ear protectors and face shield for Christmas

You now think the $6000 whole house generator seems reasonable

You own more than one 5 gallon gas can

You know how to "backfeed" 220 through the dryer plug

You look forward to discussions about the merits of "cubed, block and
dry ice"

Your therapist refers to your condition as "generator envy"

You fight the urge to put on your winter coat and wool cap and parade around in front of your picture window, when you finally get power and your neighbor across the street, with the noisy generator, doesn't get electric

You ask your sister up north to start saving the Sunday Real Estate classifieds!

You now understand generator wattage.

You proudly know that a refrigerator pulls 700 watts but a coffee pot pulls 1900 watts of generator power.

Swirling white toilet paper going down the hopper reminds you of the pictures that have been on your television for the last week.

TV rabbit ears are sold out at your local Best Buy and Wal-Mart.
(those lucky generator people)

The term "blue roof" doesn't have that fairy tale meaning any more.

Oh! That was soffit and that was fascia. You no longer are confused by those terms.

You have more than 20 C and D batteries in your kitchen drawer.

You find yourself dropping words like "millibar" and "convection" into
everyday conversation.

Your pantry contains more than 10 cans of Spaghetti Os.

Making coffee on your propane grill does not seem like an odd thing to do.

When describing your house to a prospective buyer, you say it has three bedrooms, two baths and one safe place.

You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at Home Depot.

You are delighted to pay $3 for a gallon of unleaded.

You decide that your patio furniture looks better on the bottom of the pool.

You have the number for FEMA on your speed dialer.

Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain; today you can assemble a portable generator by candlelight.

You catch a 5-pound catfish. In your driveway.

You can recite from memory whole portions of your homeowner's insurance policy.

At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy with the biggest chain saw.

You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.

There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.

You can rattle off the names of three or more meteorologists who work at the Weather Channel.

Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your roof.

Ice is a valid topic of conversation.

Relocating to North Dakota does not seem like such a crazy idea.